There are a MILLION different plans out there that are telling us how to have a cleaner house, how to be more organized, to get more out of our days. Have you been on Pinterest lately? It’s literally FLOODED with this kind of thing.
And sure, these plans are all great, because that’s what we’re looking for, aren’t we? We want the perfect house. We want the organized play room. We want to feel like we’re being effective in every aspect of our days. We want living rooms that look like they’re straight out of Martha Stewart Living and systems in place to make our lives easier.
But these plans… they are all missing the biggest and most important piece of the puzzle.
These “10 days to a cleaner house” and “How to Get it ALL Done” plans are forgetting that first and foremost, we are HUMAN BEINGS too. We are not simply cleaning/ cooking/ diaper changing machines. We don’t live JUST to clean our houses and put away the laundry.
I want you to know right now that I am never going to suggest that folding that pile of laundry is more important than taking care of yourself. I am never going to expect you to sweep your floors instead of taking a shower, or to scrub the sinks instead of getting a workout in. We are worth more than that.
When Maddie was born, I made the choice to stay home. For a long time, I put EVERYTHING first- I thought I had to! After all, this was my new “job” now, wasn’t it? And it worked for a little while. My house was clean, my to-do list was finished, and it “looked” like I had it all together.
But inside? I was falling apart.
I’d completely forgotten how to take care of myself. All of my hobbies and interests instantly went out the window, because who has time for that kind of thing when there’s a messy baby and a house to constantly clean up after? I measured my worth on how clean the house was, and how happy the rest of the family was. I’d completely and totally forgotten who I was outside of “Maddie’s mom,” or “Sam’s wife” or “Housewife.”
It wasn’t until I FINALLY learned that it was okay to let some of the small stuff go and focus on myself that things started to change. And believe me, it wasn’t easy. Especially not at the beginning.
Things would get cluttered and my brain would immediately jump into high alert mode, telling me that I should just skip that workout so I could get the bathrooms cleaned, or forgo the nap I so desperately needed because that laundry wasn’t going to fold itself.
But the plain and simple fact was, I’d made the decision to make myself a priority again, and I was going to stick with it this time.
I decided that a spotless house wasn’t worth sacrificing my mental health.I let go of the notion that everything had to be perfect, and instead found my own NEW version of perfection.
Things are a lot different around here now. If you come over, there are going to be toys on the floor. There’s probably going to be dishes in the sink, and I’m sure there will be at LEAST one pile of laundry sitting around somewhere waiting to be folded, and I am absolutely NOT going to apologize for my lack of “tidiness.” Because, me? I’m smiling again. I feel like MYSELF again. I’ve realized that nothing in this house is more important than a happy mama and a happy family, so I’m willing to let things slide a little bit.
It doesn’t mean that I’m never going to clean things up, I can’t just forgo it completely (as much as I’d love to). It just means that I’ve got a new game plan for things- one that doesn’t involve me spending every waking minute scrubbing some corner of the house. It’s a plan that allows me to have some freedom and do the things I love, too.
We are important, mamas. We are a priority. If we don’t put ourselves on the list and start taking action towards doing the things we love, then it will NEVER happen. Sometimes it just takes getting a little outside of our comfort zone to figure this out.
Let the small stuff go. It’s not worth your sanity.